I dread looking in the mirror because today is my fortieth birthday. As I stagger to the mirror I see yet another little wrinkle tied to my new graying hair. I can fix the wrinkle I guess and the hair color will get rid of the hair but it is a bit depressing.
Making my way to the kitchen a feel my body creaking and I ponder if leg arthritis is beginning. Yes this is the beginning of the end. I saw my future next week retiring with my cane because I could no longer walk or hold a job down.
As I drop off the kids to school the rain begins to pour. Great, a perfect weather forecast to match my mood. When I get to work I realize I forgot my umbrella at home. Perfect, add it up to a bad hair day for my bad old birthday.
As I get to the office there are some festive balloons in my office surrounded by the proverbial over the hill you are 40 giant balloons that I get to stare at all day. They mean well, but it sure doesn't add to my mood of feeling over the hill. So I delve into the cake they got me at lunch and think to myself why not, I'll take the calories I'm over the hill anyway.
As I look at my ringing phone I see it is a birthday call from my best friend Lisa. She probably has the perfect fun filled dig to give me while reminding me she is two years younger. But as I answered I sense that she is upset. I ask her what is wrong but she tries to play it off.
She tries not to cry but I want to know what is wrong as she tells me, 'I'm so sorry to tell you this today, but I just found out I have breast cancer and I really need a friend right now.' After hearing this devastating news I feel awful. Here I am in my pity party of one and my best friend just got the worst news of her life. As I console her and tell her it is going to be okay I am slapping myself for being such a selfish idiot.
How could I let my thoughts go so far in the negative? I am so blessed to have what I have and how could I dare complain. What is a little wrinkle when I have my health? So as I get home I rush into the house and hug my kids and my husband and realize just how blessed I truly am.
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